Al's Haiku Notebook
On a humorous note, I thought i'd share with you a fun picker-upper i have instituted in our suite.
The picture you see here is directly across from our suite's toilet, in the form of a large poster. Euphemisms have arisen due to this fact, such as:
"I need to talk to Al,"
or, in reference to a consumption of Chipotle,
"Al and I have just scheduled a long and gruesome meeting tonight."
Beside the toilet, on the floor, are some old magazines. I would read them over and over.. A "Time" from fall 2005. A "Mac World" from early January 2006. It just wasn't cutting it. We needed something that wouldn't get old. I needed something that wouldn't keep me glued to the seat longer than I should be-- I have a problem with having to read any article I begin in its entirety. So... I developed (drumroll please) "Al's Haiku Notebook.
It is a small notebook I put together with staples and folded notebook paper. The "instructions" on the first page are as follows:
"Feel Free to contribute your original haiku poem while you converse with our mutual friend, Al.
Remember: haiku are constrained by the number of syllables on each line.
Five syllables here,
While seven of them go here...
And now back to five.
Include your name if you'd like, and every once in a while, someone should write a date.
Last but certainly not least, finish using the notebook and pen BEFORE you clean yourself. Al's spirit is watching... and he's a sanitary man."
So, ridiculous as it is, I feel a need to share some of our suite's humor with you. Enjoy!
Haiku deserves more
than the relenquishment it
gets here in the pot.
Something smells vaguely
like pancakes and cranberries.
...oh yeah. And Matt's mom.
~B-Dawg (I love you, Matt!)
Forever I poop,
The haikus are a real riot,
Squeeze this last *@%! out!
~Samir 2/22
(just to let you all know, Samir didn't swear.)
Don't you hate when the
water splahes up when you
drop a big deuce down?
~Samir
Do not be like Al
and be put in the big house
and die of the Syph!
*2-22-06
Oh Dingleberries...
Just keep them out of my Trix®
And all will be fine
*2-23-06
I enjoy haiku.
I suddenly find myself
crapping more often.
~B-Dawg
What do we have here?
A girl in the boy's bathroom?
Well, isn't that odd...
~Krista
Good bye Al Capone.
I must return home today.
Never forget me...
~Krista
Dad has been ousted.
Mom can finally feel peace.
I've waited for this.
~B.Smith
Boy, it still seems like
college is so far away.
Anticipation
Was just huge back then.
It seems fit that Case didn't
meet expectations.
~B-Dawg (I know, I know. Haiku are supposed to be self-contained.)
I have had the most
violent gaseous attacks
in the past few days.
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